A few years ago I read Eat, Pray, Love, and I pretty much wanted that book to become my life. Okay, I still do. The idea that a woman could put her life on hold and travel around the world pursuing her interests is fascinating. So, when I heard that Elizabeth Gilbert was speaking at a library event, I knew I had to go to it. What pearls of wisdom would she drop? What inspiring things would she say? What would she wear?
Last week, I went with my mom and cousin to an auditorium filled with women and their anticipation. After a late start and an introduction from two different speakers, Elizabeth Gilbert was on stage. Wearing a dark cardigan, floral dress, and knee-high black boots, the woman on stage was nothing how I imagined her. I spent my teens living in a hippie town, so in my mind, if you like to travel and do yoga, you dress like a backpacker on a six month tour of Asia. Elizabeth Gilbert is much too stylish for that.
As she talked, she focused on something her mother had told her when she was growing up, “Done is better than good.” This goes against almost everything my perfectionist heart secretly craves. What? I shouldn’t try to be the absolute best at whatever my fingers touch? I can check things of the list without becoming a master of the task? The idea was shocking but, also, something that filled me with immense relief. Again and again, she came back to this point that it’s okay to finish something and move on, reminding people that if you wait for perfection you will be waiting forever.
And then, she told this wonderful story about a young man who moved to Paris to be an artist, and how he met a group of friendly aristocrats who invited him to a costume ball where some of the heads of Europe would be in attendance. The young man worked and worked to make his costume the best and most impressive costume anyone would have ever seen. When he arrived at the ball, he found himself at the top of a staircase waiting for his name to be announced, and it was then that he realized that he had made a mistake. It wasn’t just a costume ball but a themed costume ball. The theme was a Medieval court (which sounds fabulous, by the way), and he was dressed as a very realistic lobster.
Friends, being the lobster at a Medieval ball is essentially the story of my life.
The young man, however, decided to own his choice of costume. He liked it and had worked hard on it, and the only thing that had changed was the realization that he had made a mistake in translation. There was nothing he could do about that now. So, he went down the stairs, and when the people gathered around him to find out why he was dressed like that, he bowed and said, “I am the court lobster”. He spent the rest of the evening dancing with a Queen.
I love this story so much. No matter how hard you try, you will never be perfect. That’s life. Things happen. But, you can own the decisions you make. You can bow and say, “I am a silly American in a lobster costume, but this is an amazing lobster costume!” You can dance the night away with royalty, and the story can end with it just being a great night. There doesn’t need to be a fairy tale ending with a wedding and money falling from the heavens. I wish more stories ended like the young man with his lobster costume.
Eventually Elizabeth Gilbert finished speaking, and women raced down the aisle to ask her questions. Then, there was a rather long line to wait in for book signing, but the line moved quickly, and soon I was face to face with the author. I presented my copy of Eat, Pray, Love, which was opened to the desired page with a sticky note bearing my name. We said hello. She signed my book. She smiled and told me to have a good night. And, I did.
